Fitness Saved My Attitude. Rage Built My Strength.
There are two wolves inside me:
one is tired, and the other is raging through a set of deadlifts with pre-workout foaming at the mouth.
Guess which one wins every morning?
Exactly.
People always say, “Wow, you’re so dedicated,” as if dedication is the reason I show up to the gym.
Please.
I don’t train because I’m healthy.
I train because rage needs somewhere to go and punching civilians is frowned upon in most social settings.
1. I Don’t Work Out for Aesthetics — I Work Out So I Don’t Commit Crimes
Some people hit the treadmill to tone their legs.
I hit the treadmill because if I don’t outrun my own attitude, I’m going to ruin someone’s day on purpose.
Cardio isn’t fitness for me, it’s simply anger management with sweat.
And yes, the goblin children jog behind me like angry ducklings, screaming motivational insults such as:
- “FASTER, YOU FERRET!”
- “YOUR FORM SUCKS!”
- “YOU MISSED LEG DAY LAST WEEK!”
They’re helpful.
In a traumatizing way.
2. Pre-Workout Was Invented by the Devil and I Respect Him for It
Listen.
Pre-workout is not a supplement.
It’s a possession ritual.
One scoop and suddenly I’m ready to:
- fight God,
- flip a car,
- reorganize my entire life,
- challenge a raccoon to a dominance battle,
- or remodel the garage using only my bare hands and a crowbar.
My heart is screaming.
My soul is vibrating.
My goblin children are hiding behind the squat rack.
Everything is correct.
Some people meditate.
I dry-scoop rage.
3. Lifting Weights Is My Love Language… To Myself
Do I lift heavy?
Yes.
Do I know how?
Also yes, but I prefer the feral approach:
- head down
- music blasting
- hair in a messy bun that screams “I will bite”
- goblin on my back for resistance
- another goblin stealing plates
- weights clanging like thunder of engines outside a biker bar.
When I PR, I don’t celebrate.
I stand there in silence like a wild animal processing new power.
Some women glow after workouts.
I look like I crawled out of a scrapyard and I LOVE that for me.
4. Rage Is the Reason I Lift So Much Weight
Let me be clear:
I am not “strong for a girl.”
I am “strong because society has tested me too many times.”
Every rep is powered by:
- “Don’t tell me to smile again.”
- “I will NOT repeat myself.”
- “I have email rage I haven’t processed yet.”
- “My job tried me today.”
- “Someone breathed wrong at me.”
- “These goblins need to stop judging my squat depth.”
My strength is not physical.
It’s emotional damage turned into muscle mass.
God gives his toughest battles to his angriest girlies, and the Realm built a gym around it.
5. Fitness Saved My Attitude — Literally
Before training, my attitude was…
let’s call it “dangerous but charming.”
Now?
Now it’s “dangerous but less likely to result in legal consequences.”
Working out gives me:
- clarity
- patience
- endorphins
- and an acceptable outlet to scream
Because screaming in public?
Unacceptable.
Screaming during deadlifts?
Encouraged.
The gym is my sanctuary.
The weights are my therapy.
The punching bag is my confessional booth.
If I didn’t train, I’d have:
- 4 enemies
- 15 mugshots
- and one VERY spicy restraining order
6. No, I Don’t Stretch Calmly. I Stretch Like a Goblin Being Exorcised
Yoga girlies look serene.
Then there’s me:
- hair everywhere
- face red
- hamstring fighting for its life
- sweating like a biker in July
- goblin holding my ankle saying “PULL HARDERRR”
Every stretch is a full contact sport.
Every warmup is a negotiation with my body.
Every cooldown is the emotional equivalent of a car alarm.
No peace.
No calm.
Only chaos flexibility.
7. Cardio Doesn’t Build Character — Rage Does
Treadmills don’t scare me.
Ellipticals don’t scare me.
Running doesn’t scare me.
What scares me is:
- my attitude when I haven’t trained
- my temper when I skip a workout
- my demons stretching before round two
- the goblin children when they sense weakness
I don’t run to get fit.
I run so I don’t ruin my own day with the force of my mouth.
8. If You See Me Lifting Heavy — Mind Your Business
People stare.
I get it.
I’m:
- sweating
- snarling
- muttering curses
- lifting like the bar insulted my mother
- looking possessed
- shaking with rage and purpose
And the goblins?
They hype me up like:
“YOU’RE STRONGER THAN YOUR EXCUSES!!”
“BREAK THE FLOOR!!”
“LIFT LIKE YOU WANT REVENGE!!”
It’s dramatic.
It’s chaotic.
It’s gorgeous.
Don’t talk to me during reps unless you want barked at.
9. Fitness Is the Only Reason People Survive Me
If I did not work out regularly, I promise you:
- I would yell more
- I would flip off strangers with more force
- I would throw goblins
- I would get banned from Walmart
- someone would cry (me or them, unclear).
Fitness is the buffer between “me” and “arson.”
It saved my attitude.
It built my patience.
It refined my rage.
I may still be unhinged…
but I’m a muscular, regulated, dangerously stable version of unhinged.
And everyone should be grateful.
Conclusion: Fitness Didn’t Make Me Cute — It Made Me a Weapon
I don’t train to be pretty.
I train to be dangerous-but-legal, emotionally regulated, mentally sharp, physically capable, and spiritually feral.
Fitness saved my attitude.
Rage built my strength.
And goblins keep me humble.
If you relate, you’re one of us.
Welcome to the Feral Fitness Division of the Realm.
Class meets daily.
Attendance is mandatory.
Rage is included.
Goblins sold separately.\
>>STONG ENOUGH TO START OVER : MY BODY, MY COMEBACK, MY RULES<<<
>>>MORE ON FITNESS ON ONE BAD MAA<<<<
>>>RAGE IS THE HERO HERE, ROCK HER GEAR<<<
